Breaking News
Vacations rarely work out as planned. In 1980 devastating news arrived during a trip to Prince Edward Island, Canada with my aunt and uncle. My mother wrote from San Francisco to inform me my best friend from junior high, Patty Vance, was murdered. I went momentarily deaf. Whatever my mother said after that failed to […]
What’s in a Name?
Patty and I were well aware of how lucky we were to be living in San Francisco. We were never going to be anything like those kids who pined away their teens fantasizing about leaving name-your-podunk-town for the big city lights. We could find excitement any time of day, any day of the week. Sometimes […]
Ghandi Said “Descent is Easy and Often Slippery”
In the middle of December in 2015 I had the brainstorm to run my memoir idea by my mother. I was charged up about hitting on a decent idea to write about: the murder of my friend. This hyper burst of energy, translated into broadcasting it to anyone who would listen. My mother was one […]
No Way to Forget
I kneeled on my bed in mock fetal position, and tried to erase all thoughts of Patty. I’d had enough researching her case for the day. I tried to focus on anything else, but I failed miserably. My mind drifted to a fantasy I’d been entertaining that I might see the murderer face-to-face, the two […]
Where Love and Justice Meet
When I opened my email account yesterday morning, I received a letter claiming I’d “shown interest in our Restorative Justice resources.” It offered up a free book: Where Love & Justice Meet. It went on to talk about how “justice and love originate in and from God, especially through the cross and sacrifice of Jesus.” […]
Where are you Maurice?
I stumbled across this aphorism, a saying you might hang on your fridge or place on the bumper of your car: Having a son turns a new page in a woman’s story of life. Life can sometimes be hard, cruel, and confusing, especially to women. However, the existence of the son brings the reason and […]
Our Former Stomping Grounds
Researching the circumstances around Patty’s murder brought me back to our old stomping grounds. The Marina District was Patty’s neighborhood, but neither one of us felt comfortable there. The people were too snooty, parents and kids alike. They were wealthy and we were, in comparison, poor. I high tailed it out of there every day […]
THE PERFECT VICTIM
Sex workers are not disproportionately murdered as a matter of coincidence. As Ellen Killoran points out in her 2016 Rolling Stone article, prostitutes are targeted “because they don’t leave as much of a trace.” To add insult to injury, families of the deceased feel police see their loved ones as second class citizens. “They just […]
Once Was Jane Doe
In the context of law enforcement it the United States, such names are often used to refer to a corpse whose identity is unknown or unconfirmed. Back in 2016 I doubled down on my meditation practice thinking it might buttress me against my emotions. The San Francisco medical examiner’s report had arrived weeks ago. Every day I […]
Pierucci: The Phone Call
It was my goal to relay everything I’d heard about Patty’s story verbatim. But surely I was filling in gaps, shading or erasing murky or forgotten details. I tried to picture Detective Pierucci. Did his face match his tone? Was it devoid of affect or expression like his voice? Probably. I conjured him up as […]